Fear of Change

Change is scary. Especially if you know that the outcome of that change could be bad.
Your scared, unsure. Change is signficant. Like decisions.
Some changes are barely noticeable, while others are life changing. I am not going to categorize all of them, because I am most asured that we all lived through all of them.
If I say this word over and over again, I wonder why I fear it. Why does it make me unsure, nervous, fearful and confused?
I figured out a game plan. Yes, a game plan. Its so totally-spies of me, but I drawed it out. Yes, I drawed my fear down.
Basically, theres a huge spider-chart and in it is the word 'Life'. I drew lines out of it and wrote everything about life. Time, change, emotions, people, surrondings, mortality and age. Everything.
Its a big chart, you can guess. Each of the things in this chart scared me because of the huge impact they have on me. Reaching no conclusion to why I did this or why after I did it I started writing this, I am simply going to say that fear is pointless.
You may have minutes,hours or years to live and how will it help you to fear everything that is on my life spider chart? Will it help, will it not? Will it make you realize your mistakes, your moves?
Maybe. Maybe not.
I did it just to think of everything that I am, that is and that was. I feel tiny, insignficant. Thoerizing this spider chart of life, trying to sum up words of how to describe everything when I obviously can't.
So I think of it, and decide it doesn't matter.
Why? Because it does,of course, matter. The matter is that it can't be solved.
Humans, deal with it.
Humans need answers to go through life and when there is no answers they either ignore the question or either persist there is.
I say there isn't and its better that way. Life would be way too simple if we had this answers. I know easier is the better and that its more convient because I am human too, but easier is not the answer because it gains nothing. Do you feel better if you did a quick project which you copied -pasted and your teacher gave you a -D on, or a project which you fully put yourself in, your hardwork and your knowledge?
  I lot of lazyass people will choose the first one and tell me to fuck off. I won't, because the truth is easier is no effort but is...easier. But you most be aware that it gains nothing - no mistakes, no problems solved, and  no discoveries.

That was quite a range of topics I felt I needed to discuss. I always think of more and ALWAYS keep forgetting. Don't worry though. Its not like anyone cares =))

P.S Amazing writers inspire me, and I can't believe the amount of talented authors and writers there are out there. Shoutout to all of you.

Peanut butter jelly time,
 hugs and pineapples.
    Kelly